Murderous doppelgängers, MascaraGate & Billy McFarland's $1800/hr consulting 👀🍿🧃
Hi Wrecklings!
Buckle up, this week’s headlines are absolutely unreal.
❗️“Dirty Soap: The Laundress was the nice detergent on the market. Until people started breaking out into hideous rashes”- This is one of the most alarming corporate stories we’ve ever included in this newsletter❗️
These were too insane to be lost under the Serious Reads header. These women did WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!!?
“A group of guys on TikTok have been fermenting kimchi inside a Dave & Buster's and this is exactly the kind of content the internet was designed for”- And they’re also (allegedly) making pickles in a Chuck E. Cheese?
“Fyre Fest fraudster Billy McFarland is back — and asking $1,800 an hour for ‘consulting’”- Excuse me, I have nothing to say to this. So I’ll be back, just going to scream into the void.
''New York Stock Exchange's 'disaster recovery configuration' was caused by HUMAN ERROR as hundreds of stocks experienced wild price swings and halted trades when markets opened yesterday''- It feels like this is a concerningly fragile system…
“There's no whiskey in mini bottles of Fireball, so customers are suing for fraud”- Having purchased more than one of these in my youth, this is the sneakiest bait and switch ever.
“A high school basketball coach is still out $10,000 after Southwest canceled a flight and left his whole team stranded in Las Vegas for 5 days over Christmas. They ended up chartering a bus to drive 18 hours home in the snow.”- Good for these folks for going to the media.
At some point influencers need to hire publicists to kindly tell them to STFU:
“This House Is Going Viral on TikTok for Having ‘The Worst Layout Ever’”- I’ll never be able to look at Land O’ Lakes butter again without thinking about nudist resorts.
I’ve been a huge fan of Hindenburg since they took down Nikola, they’re like the vigilantes of the finance world:
''People Are So Worked Up About Mikayla Nogueira's Mascara Scandal That Even Jeffree Star Is Getting Involved''- I would have been absolutely bamboozled by this TikTok but based on the comments, the best eyelash “hack” remains to be just…fake lashes?
''Major insurers plan to drop two car models’ coverage due to thefts''- Imagine buying a car that you then can’t get coverage for because the manufacturers f’ed up.
''Anna Delvey Is Already A Better Talk Show Host Than Fallon”- The transformation from scammer to celeb is nearly complete.
''Uber Eats now shows you how much of your information is shared with delivery people''- I like this feature. Even better if it also said, “all this food is definitely for two people, not one.” JK, based on the number of utensils the restaurant puts in the bag, it seems like we’re allllllll good on that assumption.
''Consumers often can’t detect fake reviews – and underestimate how many negative reviews can be fake''- Tbh I absolutely would have fallen into this belief myself.
''Thom Browne's win against Adidas is also one for independent designers, he says''- Nice to see that Adidas can’t bogart black and white stripes.
''TikTok star’s assistant must ‘have no life,’ ‘cook and clean’ for $30K a year''- This screams of eight men who wish they still lived with their mothers.
“'People Think This “Trad Life” Carnivore Influencer Is Secretly A Woman. He Isn’t.''- While this article sounds sinister, it’s a pretty good read about the person behind a meme account (which is also a funny one).
''New scam targets restaurant patrons''- Ok, this is actually INSANE. New paranoia unlocked.
Let’s check in on the fraud that’s probably actually 245 salamanders in a suit:
''Viktor & Rolf couture show features upside-down and sideways gowns''- I am obsessed with all of the looks in this show. But also imagine being the model told to walk down the runway in this:
More Serious Stories
We realize some of these can be triggering for some readers, so feel free to skip! Also, sometimes we use weird letter subs so we’re not flagged as gross spam email.
''Influencer 'vulnerable' on Instagram over disability f3tishism''
''Why the moral panic over "grooming" is so effective at manipulating the right-wing mind''
''Beneath M&M's candy-coated image switcheroo is a dark chocolatey, ethically broke business''
“Iowa woman aged just 19 is charged with scamming $37,000 from 439 well-wishers by lying that she had pancreatic cancer and a FOOTBALL-sized tumor on her spine”
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P.S. While we’re obsessed with these stories, we don’t endorse any of these insane behaviors. 💋