Cruise ship brawl, demon dolls & Minion chaos 👀🍿🧃
And I'll never miss an opportunity to reminisce about Neopets.
Hi Wrecklings! The news headlines continue to be bad and sad, but hopefully this newsletter brings some distraction when navigating *waves hands around at everything*. P.S. You’ll notice we’re having to get creative with attempting not to get caught in spam filters for naughty words in headlines, so excuse some of that artistic creativity.
“Meet the Polish LARPers Who Pretend to Be American”- Nothing like a good old LARP group to solidify how the rest of the world sees America.
“Delta gave passengers pizza after delaying their flight as all airlines struggle with massive staffing shortages”- Wow, I would absolutely be rage-eating slices in this situation.
“The Party’s Over at Airbnb”- Curious to see how Airbnb is simultaneously allowing for some hosts to accommodate over 16 guests but are banning parties. Seems like a really thin line there, but what do I know.
“Alleged Thr33$ome Led To 60-Person Brawl On Carnival Cruise, Passenger Says”- I guess this wasn’t a great… friend… ship… 🥁💥
“Florida man, 44, is arrested after admitting to stealing items from Disney resorts, including a $10,000 'R2-D2' statue - but claims it was because he had applied to be a security guard and wanted to expose gaps in the company's security system”- Not saying he was right, but dude did make a point…
“Meet The Mom Who Lost Friends Over Her NFT Obsession”- Even as someone in the crypto and NFT space, I hated reading every word of this piece— so proceed at your own risk.
“Eleven Madison Park Wanted to Go Vegan. Then It All Went Wrong.”- Ooof, what a fall from grace. Can we all maybe finally agree that the best food ROI in NYC is found in holes-in-the-wall spots? Even in the worst case, when you’re let down by a $12 meal, you’re only out $12. Best case? You had the best meal for $12. Psst— shout-out to Super Taste and Empanada Mama.
“What does a Minion taste like?”- Oh. I just assumed they tasted like filet mignon…I’m so. so. so. sorry for that one.
“Bizarre new TikTok trend sees large groups of young men don formal suits to attend Minions: The Rise of Gru screenings - but some cinemas are BANNING the behaviour”- What are the women doing? I’m down to rock an evening gown to a Minions movie.
“What the Hell Happened to Justin Timberlake?”- “The king of cringe”? Ouuuch. RS didn’t link to any of the videos but we gotcha— here’s the awkward performance and here’s Justin apologizing for it being so bad.
“TikTok Shop Customers Are Worried That They’re Buying Fake Products”- This feels like a not-entirely-surprising realization but 🤷🏼♀️
“‘Demon dolls’ are washing up on beaches — and John Oliver is terrified”- Nope, nope, nope. Throw them back into the ocean.
“Discord teens are deploying malware for a quick buck”- I don’t know why I’m surprised that 11 year olds (?!) would already be involved in some seriously nefarious online activity. When I was 11 I was begging my parents to let me sign up for Neopets (which required them faxing a permission form to Neopets).
More Serious Stories
We realize some of these can be triggering for some readers, so feel free to skip!
“OMG, This TikToker's Defense For Flashing Her Br3a$t$ To Little Boys Is WILD!”
“Dangerous herbal abortion misinformation is thriving on WitchTok”
“TikTok Is Flooded With Health Myths. These Creators Are Pushing Back.”
“Solveig Gold Is Proud to Be the Wife of a ‘Canceled’ Princeton Professor”
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P.S. While we’re obsessed with these stories, we don’t endorse any of these insane behaviors. 💋